My Ass Is Vibrating!
by i like being a nerd
Summary: crap. i knew he would give me a birthday prank! i didn't know it would be this drastic! he screwed up my cell! damn him...[TWOSHOT] itasaku i don't own naruto. WILL NOT BE UPDATED ANY MORE. stop asking for it to be updated again....u r annoying me with it
1. my ass is vibrating!

i dont own naruto

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"Itachi! You are so dead!" Sakura screamed at the young man who was on the verge of bursting out laughing. "You screwed up my cell phone! You ass, today you are going to die!" she ran after him, chasing him into the spacious kitchen located at the center of the large place. Her bright green eyes flared with anger towards the elder Uchiha, and her wet hair was clinging to her neck…along with her white tank top and light blue jeans.

How did she end up soaking wet? Well…it was a long story…so we'll start from the beginning.

* * *

Sakura walked through the front door of the 'abandoned building', throwing her akatsuki cloak over a chair by the front door. Looking around, and seeing all the cloaks hung over the coat rack, she noticed that everyone was home. That was strange, even Itachi and Kisame were home, and they just went on a mission. Sakura pulled out her cell phone, and checked for missed calls or any texts. To her surprise, there was one from her very own overprotective Itachi. 

_Come to the kitchen, emergency meeting. Change your clothes first. _Now she was confused. Why did she have to change her clothes? They knew her well enough to know she didn't listen to any of them. Not even the leader, who was like a father to her. Screw thatplan. She simple untied her hair from her ponytail, slipped her phone back into her pocket, and made her way to the kitchen.

She walked through the dining room door, which came _before_ the kitchen, and was the only way to get to her destination. She felt like ice cold water had just been dumped on her, and guess what? It had. She seethed and opened her eyes to find a smirking Itachi.

_Damn it. I should have known he would've pulled a birthday prank on me!_ Sakura opened her mouth and let out a blood curdling scream that cracked the window to her right. All went silent, not willing to face the wrath of the pink haired kunoichi…the window was already starting to cry.

Itachi couldn't hold it in any longer and let out a small chuckle. "Nice clothes Pinky. I thought I told you to change?" Sakura looked down to find her entire body soaked to the bone…and her hot pink bra showing through her now wet white tank top. Itachi could've sworn he saw steam coming from her ears as she lunged at him, and his natural instinct kicking in causing him to run for it.

* * *

So now here we are. True to his word, everyone _was_ in the kitchen, including the leader, but not for a meeting. It was for making her birthday dinner. All eyes turned towards her soaked form, and the next thing she knew the whole room was filled with hysterical laughter. Her brow knitted in even further at this. 

"ITACHI!!!!" She screamed as loud as she could, breaking another window that was above the sink.

"Now, now Sakura, no need to be angry…heh heh…" Itachi was backing up against the kitchen table where four or five of the guys were seated, her being the only girl admitted into akatsuki.

Suddenly Sakura went rigid. Her eyes narrowed at the man in front of her, and she was silent. That is, she was silent until…

"My ass is vibrating! Aah!" She started jumping around; trying to get her phone out of her back jeans pocket, but it was too wet. She knew her phone was screwed up from the start, because it was completely wet. Anyone with a brain could figure out that a cell phone and water don't mix well.

Itachi stared at her, and his eyes drifted to her bouncing chest. _Shit._ He thought. Stupid male hormones. The other guys all smirked at him, knowing all too well what was going through his mind at the moment. Kisame, who was closest to him at the moment, said to him in a low voice, "Bet you like that view, eh? Everyone knows you always thought her to be downright sexy…even the leader did!" Itachi glared at his partner, and calmly walked up to Sakura.

Sakura was shocked at what he did next. Itachi reached his large hand behind her back to her back pocket. He reached down there, and stuck his two fingers into the pocket on each side of the vibrating cell phone. He gave it a tug, and wrenched it out of her wet pants. Sakura's mouth hung open as the others in the room started laughing at Itachi's antics.

Itachi flipped the cell phone open, and looked at the flickering screen. "It looks like you were right Pinky. Your phone is screwed." Sakura grabbed the phone from his grasp, or at least tried to. He held it out of her reach, using his towering height over her to his advantage. Sakura seethed, and unlike Itachi, failed to notice the spreading blush over her cheeks.

"Aaaw! She's blushing, un!" Deidara said from across the room where he was standing at the hot stove.

Sakura's blush increased tenfold. Ugh, and she felt so violated.

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I'm baaacckkk! you know you missed me! lols, this was a request from like way long ago. I can't remeber from who, so i have to look that up. but yes, it is obviously meant to make you laugh, though i'm not sure if it did or not. I had fun writing it though! the line 'My ass is vibrating!' popped into my head and it had itasaku written all over it so...

Sakura is a part of the akatsuki in this oneshot, so yes...but anyways, im working on the rewrite of ongoing battle, but i won't delete the original, so ya'll can vote which one you like better.

review please! if you do, i'll take any request you give me, as long as it's not yaoi or yuri...that's just sick. hope you enjoyed this! itachi may have been a little ooc, but what the hell, it's called 'fanfiction' for a reason. bye bye now!

-cat


	2. tomatoes

Sakura came back downstairs from taking a nice hot shower. After getting ice cold water dumped on you, a hot shower is something you would want. That damned Uchiha…now her cell was ruined, along with her favorite bra. Damn him. Walking into the kitchen, her hair still wet and clinging to her neck, she spotted an unusual sight;

Itachi…standing at the kitchen counter…reading a magazine…and eating _tomatoes._

Wow, that's not something you see everyday! Sakura smirked as a plan formed in her brain. Oh, she was going to get revenge on the idiot for sure now…

"Ne, Itachi? What'ya doin'?" she asked innocently, batting her eyelashes. They were alone in the kitchen, she observed. Good, no interruptions. Oooh, he was _so_ going to get it now. Heh…

He eyed her suspiciously. "I'm eating." Wow, that sure was an understatement. Congratulations Itachi, world record for shortest sentence goes to you! Well…there are shorter sentences but…whatever.

"I see that…what are you eating?" she asked innocently, the gleam in her eyes telling him something was about to go down.

"What does it look like I'm eating?"

Sakura smirked. "It looks like your eating tomatoes. I never knew you like tomatoes Itachi!" she started to giggle that annoying little giggle of hers when she thought something was just extremely out of the ordinary.

Itachi held up a particularly large slice of tomato, and stared at the pink haired girl curiously. Suddenly, she was on the other side of the room, _his_ tomato slice in _her_ hand, and she was about to eat it. Oh no…that was not going to happen _again_!

Sakura grinned as she saw Itachi's eyes narrow and the Sharingan swirl in his eyes. "Bad Itachi! I thought I told you to only use the Sharingan in battle! I only just recently healed your eyes!" she chuckled at his antics.

"Does it look like I care?" oh boy. He was moving closer now…shit. What was she supposed to do?

Well, she didn't plan for this to happen, however strong a ninja she was. Without another thought, she popped the tomato slice in her mouth, a smug smirk firmly placed on her mouth. He glared. She glared back at him. Something was bound to happen, but Sakura didn't expect what happened next to actually happen.

Sakura almost lost her balance as the elder Uchiha slammed his lips against hers in a rough, demanding kiss. She could do nothing but kiss back, seeing as she was trapped against the wall by his body and him holding her wrists above her head. He pried her lips open with his tongue, and tasted the sweet, sweet tomato he was craving. Only now, it had an even sweeter taste added to it. He liked it. A lot.

_Good God,_ Sakura thought. _He's even worse than Sasuke! _

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some people asked for a continuation...and this is the best i could come up with while on writers block...so i hope u liked it! shortness and all...i personally think it sucked. but w/e. i still don't own naruto... 


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